Some exceptions exist. If, for example, someone were to offer to purchase a lovely item for me, I might choose a small piece of art or a painting. The item really has to stand out, though, for me to be interested. I have to find it unique enough to warrant looking at every day. I'm a pretty tough critic, unless it's got a monkey on it.
I tend to remember interesting trips and sights by pictures, so I admit to having a shelf full of photo albums detailing my adventures. You don't have to look at them if you don't want to, but they are very nice.
I do like to collect a souvenir or two from places I have lived. Spend a year or two somewhere and you have more time to naturally happen upon something worth buying. I have, for example, some Russian matryoshkas--the iconic, stackable, painted wooden dolls--from my time in Russia. I have a pretty painted mug with a thistle--the national symbol of Scotland--and a cute fluffy sheep magnet from my studies in Aberdeen. I also have a kickin' pair of green high top Doc Martens from downtown Amsterdam.
And now I have Chester, the Wyoming bear.
Two words: chainsaw art! You have to be impressed. And a little scared. Chester greeted me when I came home from work one day. He seemed a natural addition to a Wyoming household.
I also have Eddie Lizard from Florida, scampering up my bedroom wall. He is from the St. Petersburg Saturday market, and finds Wyoming much too cold. I do miss seeing crazy lizards doing impressive push-ups on every sidewalk, and Eddie is a good reminder that every place has its charm.
My souvenirs from Oregon and Virginia are more lasting. Wookie was born feral in Veneta, Oregon. I think he looks happy to be a well-travelled indoor kitty.
Sammy was rescued from a shelter in Arlington, Virginia. She has since taken up sleeping, electronic music, and boxing.
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I also enjoy collecting souvenirs. I have many of them. Included in my collection is a slightly chipped glass from the Iron Skillet between Wichita and St. Louis on I-70. I also have the menu from a Waffle House I once ate in (I also kept the mug that my coffee came in as well as the salt shaker (I was about to get the pepper shaker, too, but the waitress came around and said, "I can't believe that the salt shaker is missing. I put one there this morning. I can't believe this. No, this is not possible. No, I refuse to believe that I am not looking at the salt shaker that isn't there. If I close my eyes and then open them, maybe the salt shaker will be where I put it this morning. One two three [she closes her eyes and then opens them] no, it's still not there. I wonder what I should do? I think I'll close my eyes again."))
I also have the hands dryer from a rest stop in Georgia. I tried to install it in my bathroom, but discovered that each time I used it, I threw a breaker, and all of the lights in my house went off. So, I hooked it up to a car battery that is a souvenir from a truck I saw in Tifton, Georgia. It works great, except that it burns me real bad.
In my basement, I keep souvenirs as well. There, you will find several large rocks that say "Ramada Inn Ice Bucket". There is also small piece of plastic that I think might have been used to keep six-packs together. Also, I have several coat hangers, but they aren't much use because they need the part that's attached to the pole, and I couldn't get them off.
My collection is growing. I would love some chainsaw art. I would love some chainsaw art. I would also love some chainsaw art.
Some of the things that I have have lots of sentimental value, but some things I like because they mean a lot to me personally even if they aren't worth any money. Some stuff is not worth much money. I know that, but I don't mind because value is not just about a dollar sign. No, it is not. It is about memories and apple pies and baseball.
Richard B. Cheney, Vice President of America
I am so diggin' that bear.
Who stole our bear? It was outside our retirement home in the great outdoors out west. Some people have no integrity. Now what will we have to welcome our guests and frighten our foes?
Wow, Stablong Glitzs. That's a cool name. I once named a stray Russian cat "Sabalom Glitz" after a rogue science fiction character, but your name has a slightly more menacing edge. Between you and the VP threatening me with stabbings and outright murder, I might have to take to the hills for safety. Or maybe I'll head back to Ravalox.
Does anyone know where I can pick up a can of potato salad?
What I really want is a blog about my favorite person in the whole world, Jango Fett. Did I say world? I meant to say universe. Jango Fett is well known and a force for evil. I love him very much.
His name spelled backwards is Teff Og Naj, and since Teff is an important grain grown in the highlands of the horn of Africa, I thought it would make a good blog topic. Naj is a grain which is grown across the Red Sea in Yemen, so it's apropos as well. Teff og Naj: you choose! If you didn't know (I assumed you did) og is Norwegian for 'and', so it should make sense.
I enjoy Teff on odd days of the month during summer, but I like a good Naj-shake in November and January. I don't recommend combining them because it's like mixing an acid and a base. Do you really want to do that? I didn't think so!
Can you believe that the Crown Prince Haakon is turning eighty five years old tomorrow! Jango Fett.
Did I mention that I have a hamburger on my head?
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